Mate you need help.Your frustration of not knowing who or what you are is hurting others around you.
You can’t expect to take over someone’s life and not care about their needs and wants cause you yourself don’t know what you need or not.
The person you want to suffocate isn’t like that.They are a very loving person who’s needs and wants trumps yours.That is love.Love is putting a persons needs and wants above your own.
You can’t be with anyone while you have that much hatred within yourself.That person is not a hateful person and you will make them miserable with your hatred.
You can’t change who they are and have no right in thinking you can.They are poly and nothing you can do will change that.I’ve tried believe me it won’t work.This is where love comes in.
If you truly loved them you’d accept their poly and everything else but honestly you truly don’t love them cause you will never accept that.You will never accept who they love and why.You think of your needs only not theirs that is not love,it’s selfishness.
You need to fix yourself before even thinking of being with someone like them.
All your doing is scaring them away and if that is what you want continue on the path your on but your hurting them in the process and that is not fair on them.